"Oops, that's your belly button?"

On my daily boredom-induced treks across the internet, I stumbled upon an article by AskMen.

Top 10: Subtle Ways To Tell Her She's Getting Fat

No.10 - Buy her clothes that are too small: "“Oh,” you might say, “I thought you were a size 8. Isn’t that what you were last summer?”"

No.9 - Sign her up for yoga under the pretence of "stress relief": "you’ll end up with a happier, more self-confident girlfriend rather than a grumpy lard-as"

No.8 - Set out on your own weight loss plan: "you’re also subtly telling her that you’re not the only one who might benefit from a diet"

No.7 - Serve her unsatisfactory portions: "By making her ask for more food, you might succeed in shaming her into an acknowledgment of her recent weight gain, and hopefully to instigate a conversation about what she’s going to do about it."

No.6 - Improve your own diet

No.5 - Playfully grab her love handles: "She recoils and feels embarrassment. Use this reaction to your advantage"

No.4 - Ask her to wear an old dress: "insist that she wears something from when you first got together; particularly something that you know doesn’t fit her anymore"

No.3 - Sabotage her chair (by this, they mean weaken her chair so when she sits, it breaks): "nothing says “better lose some weight” like a broken chair."

No.2 - Leave "now" and "then" photos lying around: "consistently reminding her of how she used to look, she’ll inevitably be more inclined to do something about her excess flab."

No.1 - Take her to places where she has to wear a swimsuit: "As she awkwardly looks around at all the slender bodies having a great time, she’ll more than likely vow to do something"



Really? I'm no flaming sexist, but this is mean. Although this is humorless satire, it's a huge smack in the face to wominz. If you're unable to tell your fat girlfriend she's gained weight in her face, you will die a horrible death. A woman's body isn't going to stay constant over time. When your girlfriend gets fat, you should be thrilled. It'll be like sleeping with another person.

You can read the full article here.